Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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