The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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