is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Randomize
