Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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