i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
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