She announced her abortion via fbk
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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