Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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