Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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