Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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