your parents love me but you hate me
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
