What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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