I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
