We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Randomize
