You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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