Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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