I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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