Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
