Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
