Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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