Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
