It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
