I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
