he was CRYING into my vagina
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
