is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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