Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize