Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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