we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
