i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
