Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
