i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
