So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
