It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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