Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
time to smoke my breakfast
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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