sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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