me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
