Betty ford says i'm here all night
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize