Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize