what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
