I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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