brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
