Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
