I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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