Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
