you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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