dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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