she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
