It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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