I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
