hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
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