How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
he thought i was a dude.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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