This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
