so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
